A headline destined for Leno appeared on the screen yesterday at MSNBC:
"LAW MAKES IT A CRIME TO BE ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT"
Sounds like Yogi Berra has found a new gig writing news.
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Friday, April 16, 2010
More AP goofs
Spot the errors in this AP story (two punctuation errors, two capitalization errors and one failure of an ill-informed reporter to recognize irony):
Tony Kueber's signs reflected the anger of the Kentucky Tea Party, where he sold banners Thursday bearing slogans such as "Taxed Enough Already" and "Second American Revolution."
"The Constitution," Kueber said. "It's not a difficult document. Anybody can read it."
That sentiment wove it's way through the second annual anti-tax day rally in downtown Louisville. Around 500 people gathered on a warm, sunny day to protest against the size of government, the tax code, the Democratic Party and President Barack Obama.
Interspersed throughout the crowd were nearly a dozen political candidates, including Republican U.S. Senate hopeful Rand Paul and GOP candidates for Louisville mayor and congress, seeking votes to join or lead the branches of government they spent more than two hours criticizing.
"I'm clinging to my guns, my religion and my ammunition," Paul said. Later, speaking to reporters, Paul said he was just using political rhetoric, not trying to incite anyone to violence.
Answer to the last spot-the-error challenge:
The photo cutline reade: Odong Obong, barely 3 days old, is tended to by his mother as he lays under a mosquito net in a hospital ward in Akobo, Southern Sudan, on Thursday.
Error: "lays" should be "lies"
Tony Kueber's signs reflected the anger of the Kentucky Tea Party, where he sold banners Thursday bearing slogans such as "Taxed Enough Already" and "Second American Revolution."
"The Constitution," Kueber said. "It's not a difficult document. Anybody can read it."
That sentiment wove it's way through the second annual anti-tax day rally in downtown Louisville. Around 500 people gathered on a warm, sunny day to protest against the size of government, the tax code, the Democratic Party and President Barack Obama.
Interspersed throughout the crowd were nearly a dozen political candidates, including Republican U.S. Senate hopeful Rand Paul and GOP candidates for Louisville mayor and congress, seeking votes to join or lead the branches of government they spent more than two hours criticizing.
"I'm clinging to my guns, my religion and my ammunition," Paul said. Later, speaking to reporters, Paul said he was just using political rhetoric, not trying to incite anyone to violence.
Answer to the last spot-the-error challenge:
The photo cutline reade: Odong Obong, barely 3 days old, is tended to by his mother as he lays under a mosquito net in a hospital ward in Akobo, Southern Sudan, on Thursday.
Error: "lays" should be "lies"
Friday, April 9, 2010
Military wisdom
Spot the error from an AP cutline:
Odong Obong, barely 3 days old, is tended to by his mother as he lays under a mosquito net in a hospital ward in Akobo, Southern Sudan, on Thursday.
And here are select military quotes, with plenty of civilian applications, from reader Jack in a forwarded e-mail:
"If the enemy is in range, so are you." — Infantry Journal
"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed." — U.S. Air Force Manual
"Tracers work both ways." — U.S. Army Ordnance Manual
"Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once." — Maritime Ops Manual
"Never tell the platoon sergeant you have nothing to do." — unknown Marine recruit
"If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him." — USAF Ammo Troop
"When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane, you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash." — Multi-Engine Training Manual
"What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; but If ATC screws up ... the pilot dies." — Sign over control tower door
Odong Obong, barely 3 days old, is tended to by his mother as he lays under a mosquito net in a hospital ward in Akobo, Southern Sudan, on Thursday.
And here are select military quotes, with plenty of civilian applications, from reader Jack in a forwarded e-mail:
"If the enemy is in range, so are you." — Infantry Journal
"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed." — U.S. Air Force Manual
"Tracers work both ways." — U.S. Army Ordnance Manual
"Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once." — Maritime Ops Manual
"Never tell the platoon sergeant you have nothing to do." — unknown Marine recruit
"If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him." — USAF Ammo Troop
"When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane, you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash." — Multi-Engine Training Manual
"What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; but If ATC screws up ... the pilot dies." — Sign over control tower door
Friday, April 2, 2010
Errors revealed
In case my reader ever comes back and can't figure out the answer to the most recent spot-the-error quiz, here it is.
1. After two tumultuous seasons under Billy Gillespie, Wall and Calipari led Kentucky to its 44th regular-season SEC championship, 26th conference tournament title and a No. 1 seed in the NCAA tournament.
Error: Placing "Wall and Calipari" after the prepositional phrase "After ... Gillespie." John Wall didn't play under Billy Gillespie, and John Calipari didn't coach under Gillespie. They both came after Gillespie left. The phrase refers to Kentucky, so Kentucky must follow the comma.
The sentence should have read: After two tumultuous seasons under Billy Gillespie, Kentucky won its ... tournament under Calipari and behind Wall (or: ... behind Wall's leadership).
2. Asked if the issue was dead this legislative session, Thayer said, "That remains to be seen."
If the issue's status is uncertain, it cannot be dead. The answer must be no.
By the way, add "remains to be seen" to your list of evil phrases that must never be used. It is meaningless, as it applies to everything in the future.
Other evil phrases to avoid:
"The day started out like any other."
"with interest" as in "I read, with interest, the story ..."
"We'll have to see what happens."
"at this time"
What evil phrases are on your list?
1. After two tumultuous seasons under Billy Gillespie, Wall and Calipari led Kentucky to its 44th regular-season SEC championship, 26th conference tournament title and a No. 1 seed in the NCAA tournament.
Error: Placing "Wall and Calipari" after the prepositional phrase "After ... Gillespie." John Wall didn't play under Billy Gillespie, and John Calipari didn't coach under Gillespie. They both came after Gillespie left. The phrase refers to Kentucky, so Kentucky must follow the comma.
The sentence should have read: After two tumultuous seasons under Billy Gillespie, Kentucky won its ... tournament under Calipari and behind Wall (or: ... behind Wall's leadership).
2. Asked if the issue was dead this legislative session, Thayer said, "That remains to be seen."
If the issue's status is uncertain, it cannot be dead. The answer must be no.
By the way, add "remains to be seen" to your list of evil phrases that must never be used. It is meaningless, as it applies to everything in the future.
Other evil phrases to avoid:
"The day started out like any other."
"with interest" as in "I read, with interest, the story ..."
"We'll have to see what happens."
"at this time"
What evil phrases are on your list?
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Jock talk
In honor of the NCAA tournament, here are some more great quotes from athletes and coaches.
Irish football (soccer) player and coach Johnny Giles:
"I'd rather play in front of a full house than an empty crowd."
So make sure you enjoy a pint before the match.
Dick Butkus:
I wouldn't ever set out to hurt anyone deliberately unless it was, you know important — like a league game or something."
As in National Football League?
Joe Theismann
"Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."
Case in point.
Terry Bradshaw
"I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid."
Case in point II.
Irish football (soccer) player and coach Johnny Giles:
"I'd rather play in front of a full house than an empty crowd."
So make sure you enjoy a pint before the match.
Dick Butkus:
I wouldn't ever set out to hurt anyone deliberately unless it was, you know important — like a league game or something."
As in National Football League?
Joe Theismann
"Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."
Case in point.
Terry Bradshaw
"I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid."
Case in point II.
Friday, March 19, 2010
Spot the AP error
What's wrong in these two paragraphs from AP stories?
1. After two tumultuous seasons under Billy Gillespie, Wall and Calipari led Kentucky to its 44th regular-season SEC championship, 26th conference tournament title and a No. 1 seed in the NCAA tournament.
2. Asked if the issue was dead this legislative session, Thayer said, "That remains to be seen."
More on the Oxford comma
Would it help in this statement from the Lady Vols player who scored the winning basket?
"I'd like to thank my parents, Coach Summit and God."
Well, with those bloodlines, no wonder she's so talented.
Some Stylebooks, AP included, call for eliminating the Oxford comma in most cases but make an exception when "an integral element of the series requires a conjunction." The AP example:
"I had orange juice, toast, and ham and eggs for breakfast."
I don't think the writer of this entry spent a lot of time thinking up the example. Why is the first conjunction — between "toast" and "ham" needed? Ham and eggs are still two different items, aren't they?
1. After two tumultuous seasons under Billy Gillespie, Wall and Calipari led Kentucky to its 44th regular-season SEC championship, 26th conference tournament title and a No. 1 seed in the NCAA tournament.
2. Asked if the issue was dead this legislative session, Thayer said, "That remains to be seen."
More on the Oxford comma
Would it help in this statement from the Lady Vols player who scored the winning basket?
"I'd like to thank my parents, Coach Summit and God."
Well, with those bloodlines, no wonder she's so talented.
Some Stylebooks, AP included, call for eliminating the Oxford comma in most cases but make an exception when "an integral element of the series requires a conjunction." The AP example:
"I had orange juice, toast, and ham and eggs for breakfast."
I don't think the writer of this entry spent a lot of time thinking up the example. Why is the first conjunction — between "toast" and "ham" needed? Ham and eggs are still two different items, aren't they?
Friday, March 12, 2010
Punctuation saves lives
Some of my Facebook friends recently pointed out a Facebook group entitled:
"'Let's eat Grandma!' or 'Let's eat, Grandma!' Punctuation saves lives!"
The page contains amusing examples of mangled English and unintended messages, as well as discussions on usage. One discussion is on the Oxford comma.
An Oxford comma is the comma before the conjunction in a series. In the following sentence, the Oxford comma is immediately after the word "barbecue":
He bought corn-dogs, barbecue, and cotton candy at the fair.
Newspapers that use the Associated Press Stylebook eliminate the Oxford comma, deeming it unnecessary. The purpose is conserving space — all those commas add up, you know.
But leaving it out can have unintended consequences. An example from the Facebook discussion, sourced to a Peter Ustinov documentary:
"Highlights of his global tour include encounters with Nelson Mandela, an 800-year-old demigod and a dildo collector."
Either that describes a most eclectic tour or it reveals things I never would have suspected about Nelson Mandela.
"'Let's eat Grandma!' or 'Let's eat, Grandma!' Punctuation saves lives!"
The page contains amusing examples of mangled English and unintended messages, as well as discussions on usage. One discussion is on the Oxford comma.
An Oxford comma is the comma before the conjunction in a series. In the following sentence, the Oxford comma is immediately after the word "barbecue":
He bought corn-dogs, barbecue, and cotton candy at the fair.
Newspapers that use the Associated Press Stylebook eliminate the Oxford comma, deeming it unnecessary. The purpose is conserving space — all those commas add up, you know.
But leaving it out can have unintended consequences. An example from the Facebook discussion, sourced to a Peter Ustinov documentary:
"Highlights of his global tour include encounters with Nelson Mandela, an 800-year-old demigod and a dildo collector."
Either that describes a most eclectic tour or it reveals things I never would have suspected about Nelson Mandela.
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